4 June 2015


He asked me tempoh hari, "Syakila rasa A boleh sembuh tak?". I answered him by saying, " A boleh sembuh..Syakila yakin 106%..hehe". Sempat lagi aku melawak dgn dia. Like always.

Actually, I lied to him.

I doubt that he can be cured. I doubt he can recovered.

In the end, he's gonna die. And I will be left brokenhearted. When i typed the word "die", you donno how much it's hurt. It's killing me. It's killed me to say that.

Praying and supporting you, I'll always be. I don't want to be attached to you intensely. You'll be gone anyway. I know by saying this, I am mean. Really MEAN. I don't want to hurt myself anymore. I don't want to grieve. Damn! After some time for sure I'll cry a lot reading this! I will feel regret run through my bonds.

Sometimes it is really strange that I can read what you felt. It's like we are one. You are me. And I am you. It's just that you are smarter than me, brilliant.

Nevertheless, deep inside here, I pray you can be cured. I pray for some miracles from Allah. I pray for you to be happy in this world. The world without my presence of course.

Allah..jauhi aku daripada kesedihan yg sia-sia.

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